Monday, April 28, 2025

   


                                                                 THE SINGING STONES


In empty places without the mercy of water.

In long forgotten canyons and along dry mesa tops.

I have sought my soul among the lost and the dead,

who do not rest.


The wind carries a song that calls me back to 

firelight, smoke and memories.

Flesh that feels the approach of winter and

a heart that leaps with the joy of spring.


Voices raised in soft words, babble like water after rains.

Sweet sage & pine & scrubs scent the air.

To where do I wander? Can I find that moment, that day?


Come Great Spirit, lead me forward to that place to which you 

have drawn me.  To rocks that sing my name.  I have

heard them in dreams.


Across the great desert and through the dwellings of another people

Into the rock womb where I was formed, into the beginning

place I go, to find my place among the living or perhaps my rest

among these dead.  For seasons pass.  Wind, snow and then 

wailing winds in the canyons. Golden leaves, rabbit prints,

warmth of day, cold nights.


Sounds carry so far, chirping, night stars and moonlight

full of curious shadows, scents on the breeze,

bright sunsets and dawn light splitting the earth dark from light.

The rocks sing my name in this place. 


My soul forever thirsts 

for this beauty and weeps within me, like the

sounds of the flute echoing through the canyons.

Leading me to a cold kiva by a spruce tree, to rocks

there.  These rocks shaped my body then and sing 

my name now.


Thursday, April 24, 2025

 



                                                              One Last Dream


I am awake.  I awoke at about 2:30 AM after another dream of my ex husband telling me he is leaving me, which I have relived in my dreams over and over since he left me after 27 years of marriage.  

Something about this dream was different.  He looked young and well.  Thin even as he was at twenty.  In my dream he had been gone a long time and I was angry when he finally came home.  I berated him for staying gone so long.  He told me he wanted out of our marriage.  After all, what good was he to me having no job?  I was suddenly distracted by a woman on television winning the lottery. Her husband had left her too and I called his attention to it as if it was relevant.  

Then, we talked and I told him I would miss him so much and asked didn't he love me anymore?  Where upon he replied, he would always love me and I saw in his eyes, it was true.  He took me warmly by the hand and smiled.  Then I remembered the Catholic Church had given us an annulment. It was true, but this happened 28 years ago.  I said, well, the Church had given us an annulment so I guess you are right to go, but I will miss you always and in truth, despite all the pain he caused me when we were married, I have missed the good man I knew in our earliest years together, for all these years since he left me.   

He is now 81 and in very serious condition in the hospital.  I am wondering if he has passed away this very night and he came to make peace and say goodbye.  If so, welfare and rest in peace.

I'll know in the morning.